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Fun Times!
Dec 26, 2010


I was talking to a friend today and the topic of home birthing came up. She claimed to be slightly opposed to hospital births (excepting complications) as home birthing is "more natural." Having not read much into the topic, my initial thoughts are that hospital births must be much safer for the child and mother. Can someone help educate me?
I feel that hospitals are more modern than home births, but I admit that I have almost no knowledge of how they happen. Is anesthesia used? What about after the birth, is the baby then taken to a hospital? Is home birth a question of safety at all or merely culture?

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chknflvrdramen
Sep 11, 2007
Making the world a better place... with cookies!

Fun Times! posted:

I was talking to a friend today and the topic of home birthing came up. She claimed to be slightly opposed to hospital births (excepting complications) as home birthing is "more natural." Having not read much into the topic, my initial thoughts are that hospital births must be much safer for the child and mother. Can someone help educate me?
I feel that hospitals are more modern than home births, but I admit that I have almost no knowledge of how they happen. Is anesthesia used? What about after the birth, is the baby then taken to a hospital? Is home birth a question of safety at all or merely culture?

Anesthesia is sometimes used, depending on the hospital, physician, mother's circumstances and mother's wishes. I feel that it's used far too often. Sometimes after a home birth the baby goes to the hospital, if necessary, but I believe that most of the time the baby stays at home with its mother and goes to the pediatrician a day or two later. Some people are of the opinion that homebirthing is actually safer when a midwife is present because there is far less risk of unnecessary interventions.

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ChloroformSeduction
Sep 3, 2006

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Fun Times! posted:

I was talking to a friend today and the topic of home birthing came up. She claimed to be slightly opposed to hospital births (excepting complications) as home birthing is "more natural." Having not read much into the topic, my initial thoughts are that hospital births must be much safer for the child and mother. Can someone help educate me?
I feel that hospitals are more modern than home births, but I admit that I have almost no knowledge of how they happen. Is anesthesia used? What about after the birth, is the baby then taken to a hospital? Is home birth a question of safety at all or merely culture?

Really, it depends on where you are. If you're in the states, it varies widely from state to state, as there are different rules in different states. I disagree with homebirths in most places for safety reasons, however, you're going to get a variety of opinions. What area are you guys in?

ETA:

It looks like in FL they're licensed, and if you go to MANA's website, you can find the current status of laws in FL:
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However, just by looking at these laws, I don't think that the training is sufficient. Schooling is less than what is required for a nurse, and based on a quick scan, it looks like they only need to see 25 births for licensing. Compare that to an OB in a busy-ish hospital who's going to be seeing that many a week (if not more), for 4 years after completing their schooling before they can practice. So basically in FL, it's better than in a lot of states, but nowhere where it needs to be, imho (this is just based on a quick search, I have no idea on what the midwifery board is like there in terms of transparency and the like, in some states, they're pretty bad.) There are some red flags for homebirth midwives in the states in general, such as the fact that MANA refuses to release their safety figures, which should give anyone pause.

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Fun Times!
Dec 26, 2010


We're in Florida but we're just talking in a "had a general discussion in class and this is interesting" sort of way. Because it is!

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Fire In The Disco
Oct 4, 2007
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Hospital births are very necessary for some women who have high risk pregnancies, e.g. diabetic women, women with high blood pressure, and so on. If a woman has a very normal, low risk pregnancy, though, a home birth is a totally safe option and is often desired because it allows the woman to have more say in her labor and delivery, and it allows her to have her baby in an environment she feels most comfortable in.

I had written up this humongous long scenario-based post showing some differences between the two choices, but decided it was too long to post her. So if you do want to read it, PM me.

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peanut
Sep 9, 2007



Home births are also growing in popularity in the US because so many people are uninsured or underinsured. If everything goes well, a home birth can save the family a significant amount of money.

(I live outside the US and gave birth 3 weeks early in a hospital.)

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hookerbot 5000
Dec 21, 2009


In the UK studies have suggested that home births are actually safer than hospital births for women with no complications during the pregnancy and have delivered a baby vaginally with no complications previously (but of course now I say that I can't find the source).

From what I can gather though I think the midwife system in the US is different than in the UK - over here it would only be in high risk pregnancies that you would even see a doctor as pregnancy and childbirth is midwife led care.

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fishandcandy
Jul 10, 2006


peanut posted:

Home births are also growing in popularity in the US because so many people are uninsured or underinsured.

Is this really true? I know a home birth is a lot cheaper than a hospital birth but I've never heard of this being hot nude free videos the reason for a home birth.

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opie
Nov 28, 2000
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When you guys got sick during pregnancy, who did you call first, the obgyn or a regular doctor? I think I just have a cold, but it's lasted for over a week and now my ears feel like they're about to erupt. I don't have a regular doctor yet, so I would go to urgent care to rule out an infection. I tried calling the obgyn office but they couldn't hear me with the only phone I have.

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Fire In The Disco
Oct 4, 2007
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During pregnancy, your OB is your primary care physician, and I have heard of some OB's getting pretty testy if their patients talk about going to see their old PCP during pregnancy.

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chknflvrdramen
Sep 11, 2007
Making the world a better place... with cookies!

Fire In The Disco posted:

During pregnancy, your OB is your primary care physician, and I have heard of some OB's getting pretty testy if their patients talk about going to see their old PCP during pregnancy.

I actually still saw my OB for almost everything in the first year post-partum because I wanted someone who was very familiar with what drugs were OK to give to a breastfeeding woman.

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opie
Nov 28, 2000
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I don't have a primary care doctor because we moved here while I was pregnant and I haven't needed anything other than an ob. Anyway I called the nurse at the ob office and she said I could take sudafed and plain robitussin, and if I was still all congested after a couple of days then I should go to urgent care and make sure I don't have an infection. I figure I'll start with the sudafed and see how that goes.

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chknflvrdramen
Sep 11, 2007
Making the world a better place... with cookies!

opie posted:

I don't have a primary care doctor because we moved here while I was pregnant and I haven't needed anything other than an ob. Anyway I called the nurse at the ob office and she said I could take sudafed and plain robitussin, and if I was still all congested after a couple of days then I should go to urgent care and make sure I don't have an infection. I figure I'll start with the sudafed and see how that goes.

You can also try Breathe Right strips and a humidifier in the meantime. Hope it clears up without you having to go to Urgent Care!

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Farrah
Jun 19, 2008


I saw my OB nurse for my horrible cold and she did a strep test but ended up sending me to my general practitioner anyway a few days later when I was still miserable. He told me to have hot chicken soup and tea. He did check to make sure I didn't have pneumonia.

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CrispyMini
May 31, 2005
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I had a planned hospital birth for my first, and a planned home birth for my second. Barring complications, both can be totally safe, legitimate, and wonderful ways to give birth.

I can't speak for other regions, but in BC Canada, there are very strict "rules" that midwives follow to approve a client for a home birth. Following that has resulted in statistics for both maternal and newborn outcomes that are either the same for hospital as home birth, or even better outcomes for home birth. The great things about home birth is a lower risk of secondary infections (there are no other sick people in your own home!), lower rate of necessary interventions, and a lower rate of perenium tearing.

In my case, my first was a planned hospital birth because I wasn't entirely sure about the whole labor thing, and wanted to have as many options available to me as possible. My birth plan was "meh, we'll see how it goes". As it was, my baby was posterior and took his sweet rear end time coming out- 47 hours of labor, and delivered in the OR by forceps assist (and about an inch away from having been a c-section. My husband says he saw them nearly go for it.) I would have ended up at the hospital anyways, so it was just as well I'd planned for it to go that way

My second was a planned home birth. I figured if we never had any other kids, I didn't want to feel like I'd "missed out" on anything. So we went all out on granola with hiring a doula, had the birthing tub, the labor ball, pillows, massage oil, aromatherapy, homeopathy remedies, and some crazy yoga music/Sarah McLaughlan. The birth itself went well, baby was happy and healthy, but I had a retained placenta and needed an emergency hospital transfer an hour after the birth. I wasn't an EMERGENCY emergency, but we got to the hospital and into a room so fast that it really solidified for me the safety of birthing at home. Had anything gone wrong, we would have had the emergency care we needed.

My midwife had said at some point, "decision to incision is 30 minutes, whether you're at home or at the hospital", meaning that from the time the midwife makes the call on needing a c-section, it takes 30 minutes to get the OR ready and get you transferred there, whether you're coming from home or from the labor room in the maternity ward. Granted, this is coming from a downtown community with a hospital right in the middle, no more than a 10-minute ambulance ride away. If I was a good distance away from a hospital, it's possible my decision for home birth may have been different.

At any rate, I had a great experience with both births, and highly recommend either option to new moms-to-be. If I had a third baby, I'm still not entirely sure which way I'd go. (The birth tub at home was lovely, but that epidural was like MAGIC. And, I'm sure my husband would tell you that the home cleanup is a pain in the rear end. FYI, club soda and Nature's Miracle will take blood out of carpets like it never happened!)

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Dogfish
Nov 4, 2009


Fun Times! posted:

I was talking to a friend today and the topic of home birthing came up. She claimed to be slightly opposed to hospital births (excepting complications) as home birthing is "more natural." Having not read much into the topic, my initial thoughts are that hospital births must be much safer for the child and mother. Can someone help educate me?
I feel that hospitals are more modern than home births, but I admit that I have almost no knowledge of how they happen. Is anesthesia used? What about after the birth, is the baby then taken to a hospital? Is home birth a question of safety at all or merely culture?

As previously mentioned, it depends hugely on who you are and where you are. There are some circumstances in which a hospital birth is necessary - high-risk births shouldn't take place at home. For low-risk births, it's a matter of weighing factors such as how far away you live from a hospital (in case there needs to be an emergency transfer of care), whether you have access to a skilled birth attendant like a registered midwife (in Canada) or certified nurse-midwife (in the States) at home, and so on.

I can't speak to home births anywhere but in Ontario, but epidural anaesthesia (which is what I assume you mean by anaesthesia) is not administered in a home birth setting. It needs to be given by an anaesthesiologist, and they generally don't make house calls. After the birth, if baby is healthy and happy, there's no reason for her to be taken to a hospital, so she stays at home.

Safety is an interesting question. Overall, most (reputable) studies show that home birth is as safe as or very slightly less safe than hospital birth in terms of infant morbidity and mortality. Most studies, at the same time, show that hospital birth is not as safe as home birth for mothers - rates of episiotomy and infection, for example, are generally much higher in hospital births. So overall safety is really a matter of risk assessment in an individual case - there are pros and cons to each birth location.

Many women choose a hospital birth because they find that having the option of interventions "just in case" is really reassuring. Many women choose a home birth because they find that the added risk of intervention makes them nervous. The most important thing in an uncomplicated, low-risk birth is for Mum to feel as comfortable and safe as possible, so, ultimately, it's a very personal decision and whatever a woman chooses is the right thing for her and her family.

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Jan 14, 2006

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Home birth for low risk mothers is safe with the right conditions. One condition is a trained professional. In the US there are two types of midwives: certified professional midwives and certified nurse midwives. CNMs have extensive training (a full six years of education plus residency), but CPMs have apprentice training.

There are numerous studies that show no significant difference in neonatal outcomes, and all show less risk of certain interventions, complications, and C-sections. There is only one study that shows an increased risk of neonatal mortality with homebirth compared to hospital birth. However, the study did not control for low v. high risk women, the type of birth attendant (CPM, CNM, or unassisted), or a host of other factors. Yet, while there was a 3x vintage big tit porn relative risk, the actual risk remains very low. I have all of these studies if anyone's interested in a giant post of risk v. benefits!

If you ensure safety by picking an experienced CNM, being a few miles from a hospital, and being low risk--then homebirth is an extremely good option. However, it's not a good idea with risk factors or if you think you might want to go with an epidural.

I was planning to go that route, but I have to give birth in my current location instead of my hometown due to my teaching contract--and our place here is such a tiny termite-infested shittdump that I wouldn't want to birth here. Plus, traffic sucks so bad that it would take WAY too long to get emergency care if needed.

I have a CNM who welcomes all of my questions and the hospital I'm birthing at seems very supportive of natural birth, so I'm optimistic.

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Dogfish
Nov 4, 2009


LuckyDaemon posted:

Home birth for low risk mothers is safe with the right conditions. One condition is a trained professional. In the US there are two types of midwives: certified professional midwives and certified nurse midwives. CNMs have extensive training (a full six years of education plus residency), but CPMs have apprentice training.

There are numerous studies that show no significant difference in neonatal outcomes, and all show less risk of certain interventions, complications, and C-sections. There is only one study that shows an increased risk of neonatal mortality with homebirth compared to hospital birth. However, the study did not control for low v. high risk women, the type of birth attendant (CPM, CNM, or unassisted), or a host of other factors. Yet, while there was a 3x janet jackson sunbathing naked relative risk, the actual risk remains very low. I have all of these studies if anyone's interested in a giant post of risk v. benefits!

If you ensure safety by picking an experienced CNM, being a few miles from a hospital, and being low risk--then homebirth is an extremely good option. However, it's not a good idea with risk factors or if you think you might want to go with an epidural.

I was planning to go that route, but I have to give birth in my current location instead of my hometown due to my teaching contract--and our place here is such a tiny termite-infested shittdump that I wouldn't want to birth here. Plus, traffic sucks so bad that it would take WAY too long to get emergency care if needed.

I have a CNM who welcomes all of my questions and the hospital I'm birthing at seems very supportive of natural birth, so I'm optimistic.

Yeah, the Wax et. al. study shows a tiny absolute increase in neonatal mortality, and also a huge absolute increase in maternal morbidity! So even IF we accepted that a metaanalysis that includes retrospective data from the 70s, studies with only eight participants from a single practice, etc. was valid (which we wouldn't do because we are all very smart), one would think that its recommendations would be "Let's make home birth safer by ensuring that everyone has a skilled attendant who's trained in neonatal resuscitation (the biggest cause of death reported in the study was respiratory failure) and is within safe transfer distance of a hospital," not "No one should ever give birth at home," which was the spin that was put on it.

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A Serious Woman
Sep 9, 2010


Thanks for all the tips on helping to make breastfeeding work!

Yesterday we went to a free breastfeeding clinic offered by our city. It was staffed by a lactation consultant and three public health nurses. It was absolutely great! They weighed Zoey and I was shocked to learn that not only had she regained her birth weight, but she was up a total of 6 additional ounces! My baby is a becoming really chunky! The LC had me try breastfeeding with a nipple shield and although I was skeptical, I was surprised that it actually worked. We're totally off bottles now and feeding exclusively with the nipple shield. Although I'm happy about this, I do have my reservations.

Have any of you used nipple shields? If so, were you ever able to transition to not using them? I'm also concerned with my oversupply issues. There's no way Zoey can keep up with me but I'm scared about engorgement and blocked ducts. The LC suggested I cut back how much I'm pumping but I'm scared about developing problems if I don't properly drain my breasts. Have any of you had these issues?

Also, the LC suggested that she has a minor tongue tie. She referred us to a doctor to have it looked at but I'm weary of having the procedure done. My midwife said she's not tongue tied at all. So, I guess I'm just a little confused. Have any of you had your child's tongue clipped?

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Fire In The Disco
Oct 4, 2007
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You can hand express the first part of your letdown and then latch her on, if that makes it easier for you. That might be a little more gentle than the pump. Also, block feeding is generally considered the go-to solution for overactive supplies:

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I never used the nipple shield myself, but I have no less than three friends from my childbirth class who did, and they all were able to wean off of them as their babies got bigger and more proficient at nursing.

As for the tongue tie, a lot of babies with very minor ones do fine without getting them clipped. If you find that she continues to have lots of problems latching, that is when I would talk to a doctor, personally.

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Crabsurd
Dec 19, 2006


A Serious Woman posted:

Have any of you used nipple shields? If so, were you ever able to transition to not using them? I'm also concerned with my oversupply issues. There's no way Zoey can keep up with me but I'm scared about engorgement and blocked ducts. The LC suggested I cut back how much I'm pumping but I'm scared about developing problems if I don't properly drain my breasts. Have any of you had these issues?

Also, the LC suggested that she has a minor tongue tie. She referred us to a doctor to have it looked at but I'm weary of having the procedure done. My midwife said she's not tongue tied at all. So, I guess I'm just a little confused. Have any of you had your child's tongue clipped?
I used nipple shields for probably two or three months? I can't really remember, but we definitely managed to wean her off them just fine. Once I thought she was ready and would accept it, I started trying a few feeds here and there without the shield. Or starting a feed with the shield, and then whipping it off partway through and latching her back on quickly.

FITD gave you a good link about oversupply. Midwives in the hospital also told me only to pump for relief/comfort, rather than to completely empty the breasts (I did that, and I've never gotten plugged ducts/mastitis). Otherwise you'll just stimulate milk production. The Kellymom website also has good pages about engorgement (and plugged ducts) if that's a problem.

How old is Zoey? They have a few growth spurts early on, so you might end up feeding for hours at a time (or what feels like it), which might help do something to empty you out. Nah, but oversupply does usually fix itself after a few months anyway.

About the tongue tie, I would say that if it's not affecting her feeding, it's not really significant enough to warrant a procedure. You could always get it checked out just in case though.

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auri
Jul 8, 2005


A Serious Woman posted:

Also, the LC suggested that she has a minor tongue tie. She referred us to a doctor to have it looked at but I'm weary of having the procedure done. My midwife said she's not tongue tied at all. So, I guess I'm just a little confused. Have any of you had your child's tongue clipped?

My son was slightly tongue tied which made breast feeding extremely difficult for the first month. As he got older though he got stronger and his tongue grew as well so it stretched out enough that he could finally latch on. My pediatrician said when a tongue tie is so slight it's better to just wait it out as they usually "out-grow" it. For a while he could stick his tongue out but it would have a pinch in the middle, and now he can stick his whole tongue out no problem.

Talk to a pediatrician about it and decide with a couple informed opinions, but I personally didn't feel clipping was necessary. I guess it all depends on the severity.

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Dr. Retarded
Jul 28, 2007
"It gets two squeaks, 'cuz it's the funniest one of all!!!"

A Serious Woman posted:

Have any of you used nipple shields? If so, were you ever able to transition to not using them? I'm also concerned with my oversupply issues. There's no way Zoey can keep up with me but I'm scared about engorgement and blocked ducts. The LC suggested I cut back how much I'm pumping but I'm scared about developing problems if I don't properly drain my breasts. Have any of you had these issues?
Jude wouldn't latch for the first few weeks bc he was confused - he was drinking bottles of formula in the hospital due to jaundice and it really caused an issue for him. I pumped and fed him via bottle for about a week and then went to see an LC and she gave me what for me was God's gift - a nipple shield. We used it every time until he was 5 weeks old and around that time he started to seem frustrated by it on his own (I definitely was at that time) and I slowly started offering my breast without the shield during the day. For a while he could only do one boob without the shield and only in the afternoon bc they were so much bigger in the morning. Then suddenly we were off the shield entirely - I think it was around 6 and a half weeks? We have been pros ever since and he is a terrific eater and very efficient. He takes bottles when I am at work and there is no confusion whatsoever.

I also had oversupply issues bc of all of the pumping and I did block feeding - you feed on one side only for 2 or 3 feeds in a row for a day or 2 - it worked itself out on its own.
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Before that he was sputtering and coughing and pulling away and shaking his head frantically, so I knew I had to do something. I still make plenty of milk - more than double of what I need for the day for him (he only gets a bottle once or twice while I am at work bc I can feed him on my lunch break) and my freezer is full and I am now actively looking to donate.

Keep at it - it gets better, I promise.

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Sep 17, 2004

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Fun Times! posted:

I was talking to a friend today and the topic of home birthing came up. She claimed to be slightly opposed to hospital births (excepting complications) as home birthing is "more natural." Having not read much into the topic, my initial thoughts are that hospital births must be much safer for the child and mother. Can someone help educate me?
I feel that hospitals are more modern than home births, but I admit that I have almost no knowledge of how they happen. Is anesthesia used? What about after the birth, is the baby then taken to a hospital? Is home birth a question of safety at all or merely culture?
I've been writing and deleting this post several times over the past hundred pages of this thread and finally I just decided to go with it.

Some context, my mother has 5 children, 3 were hospital births and 2 home births. I actually cut the umbilical on my younger sister, as she was born in my parent's bedroom on their bed and I was old enough to be aware/helpful. My mother was pretty darn crunchy about anything that's motherhood related, cloth diapered and breastfed, the whole 9 yards.

She had her first and second child in the hospital, natural delivery. For my brother and sister who were home births, she simply had found a midwife that made her comfortable and confident about it, while simultaneously having gotten a handle on what she could reasonably expect from her body during the birthing process. For her 5th child, we had long since moved out of that house and she wanted to try a different technique, and also try out a new birthing center that had opened in the neighborhood.

My wife and I are expecting our first child in May, my wife is an avid reader of this thread but she prefers to lurk. We're not going with a home birth and honestly my mother discouraged us from considering it. That is because she understands that we are different people, and we are not seeking that experience. I spoke to my father about his opinions, and his feelings were really mixed. For the first child he recommended a hospital, as they will hold your hand and direct you, guide you through everything because that is their job and you're just a patient to them.

However, he said that they really regretted going back to the hospitals after the home birth experience because they gave up all the control they had over the process. The hospital staff has a business to run, it's sad but true that the US medical system is not a for-patient enterprise. It is for-profit and they are not going to give you the freedom or flexibility a midwife will in your own home. My parents got to do all their weird hippie poo poo, like burying the placenta underneath the roots of a new willow tree in the back yard (and letting their oldest son cut the cord for his baby sister). They got to do it their way.

That's what you should take away from the discussion RE: home birth.
naked puerto rican chicks This is assuming that you and your medical professional agree that there is not a MEDICAL reason that you need to be in a hospital for the birth of your baby.

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A Serious Woman
Sep 9, 2010


Thanks all for your input on the nipple shields and the tongue tie, it's very much appreciated!

We saw the doctor today for the tongue tie and ended up getting it done. I think Zoey having it done was harder on me than it was on her. The doctor had to restrain her and that was why she flipped out. After he cut her tongue and removed the restraints, she instanly stopped crying. I was then able to breastfeed her and although it was with the nipple shield, it seemed like it was far less work on her part. Here's hoping that we can start to transition away from using the nipple shield!

So, I've had a number of people say to me that I should try to start getting my baby on a schedule. I mean, she's two weeks old, she's too young for a schedule right? Normally we're in bed most nights by 8:30-9:00 and we're up by 7:00-8:00 the next morning with usually only 3-4 feedings per night with almost no fussing. I figure that's about as good a schedule I can get a two week old on.

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Andale!Andale!
Aug 23, 2008


At two weeks old, especially since you're breastfeeding, you need to be listening to her. Don't try to put her on a schedule. She will tell you what she needs and in the end you will have less stress if you are going with her flow.

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Twatty Seahag
Dec 30, 2007


There's no point in putting her on a "schedule" because it's going to change. At 2 weeks Pixley's sleeping/feeding habits were totally different than even 4 weeks and now at 7 weeks. We're just now establishing a bedtime routine, but the timing's still different almost every night.

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chknflvrdramen
Sep 11, 2007
Making the world a better place... with cookies!

You are doing fine, whoever is telling you to put a two week old baby on a schedule is a moron.

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peanut
Sep 9, 2007



They might be confusing schedule for a routine. Moving to the bedroom around the same time every night is the best you can do with a newborn.

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Dr. Retarded
Jul 28, 2007
"It gets two squeaks, 'cuz it's the funniest one of all!!!"

A Serious Woman posted:

So, I've had a number of people say to me that I should try to start getting my baby on a schedule. I mean, she's two weeks old.
Stop listening to anything these people say. Please.

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Sep 11, 2001

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Dec 25, 2008

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peanut posted:

They might be confusing schedule for a routine. Moving to the bedroom around the same time every night is the best you can do with a newborn.

Agreed 100%!

We have never aimed for a specific schedule, but as our baby grew, he started sleeping around the same time. Very early we started differentiating day and nighttime. Then we started putting him to bed around the same time each night. Sometime after a feed between 7-9 pm. After a while he got tired around the same time, earlier and earlier, until he went to bed pretty consistently at around 7. It is possible to get a routine going, but it's best to work with your baby and don't stress it! Notice when he gets tired, then start putting him to bed a little before that to avoid overtiredness for example.

I did a nap chart for a while, to see patterns in his sleeping habits - then I started trying to join together some of the smaller naps into longer ones. Just remember, A Serious Woman, 2 weeks is really young. I didn't start seing a pattern until 4 weeks I think.

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Pluto
Apr 18, 2006

Weak.

fishandcandy posted:

Is this really true? I know a home birth is a lot cheaper than a hospital birth but I've never heard of this being naked science great lakes the reason for a home birth.

It played a role in what we decided. Our insurance doesn't cover maternity because they just don't want to (fix THAT poo poo Obama) so we decided to go with a midwife in a birthing center ($4500ish) instead of an OB birth in a hospital ($12000ish).

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The Young Marge
Jul 19, 2006

but no one can talk to a horse, of course.

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Jan 14, 2006

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I would just say I'm on pain medication for my back or antibiotics. Don't know what to do about refusing a joint though--that wouldn't be affected by medication.

Or you can say you got blackout drunk and ended up in a gutter without your shoes and that scared you into drying out for a while, but that might come with its own set of problem

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A Serious Woman
Sep 9, 2010


The Young Marge posted:

I haven't seen this discussed yet... Did anyone else have to deal with people noticing a change in your behavior and commenting on it WAY before you were ready to tell you were pregnant? I play lots of bar gigs, go out a lot, have a family whose get-togethers always include drinking, co-workers go to the bar for lunch, etc. I just found out on Thursday, and have already been in three different situations where people are noticing I'm not drinking. I don't miss drinking; I just want them to leave me alone and stop demanding that I do shots with them, and then ACCUSING me of being pregnant!

Help me figure out what to do before I end up killing every one of my friends and family members. It's unusual for me to not be drinking, and everyone is noticing and commenting. I want to be able to announce it on my own terms, not by some drunk idiot blurting it out in a bar. I have to go to an open mic night tonight and am just dreading "let me buy you a beer" and "come smoke a joint with us."

This was pretty much me for a good long while. I just told everyone that I was suffering from a chronic sinus infection and had been given a broad spectrum antibiotic that was a three week dose and I couldn't drink while taking it. Of course, this only lasted for 3 or so weeks but it allowed me to get to a point where I felt comfortable telling family and close friends. I know it's a tough situation so hopefully some folks here will give some ideas on how to handle it.


I have a question for folks about cosleeping. We've been cosleeping since Zoey was born and it's starting to kill my neck and shoulders. I'm overly conscious about having her in the bed and as a result, I'm not tossing or turning very much. I tried to transition her to the bassinet last night but it was largely unsuccessful. After crying for about 5 minutes, I pulled her into the bed with me. I'm not sure if being in the bassinet is harder on her or me! How do I transition an infant to a bassinet when she seems completely uninterested in it? Am I stuck sleeping with her until she gets a bit older? I love having her in the bed with me, I just need her out for the sake of my neck and shoulders.

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VorpalBunny
May 1, 2009

Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog


I love me some stinky cheese, and what tipped people off to my being pregnant more than skipping the booze was skipping the cheese.

Can you get virgin cocktails, and just carry them around all night? Can you just get a tonic and lime or something? Near beer in a glass?

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dreamcatcherkwe
Apr 14, 2005
Dreamcatcher

A Serious Woman posted:

I have a question for folks about cosleeping. We've been cosleeping since Zoey was born and it's starting to kill my neck and shoulders. I'm overly conscious about having her in the bed and as a result, I'm not tossing or turning very much. I tried to transition her to the bassinet last night but it was largely unsuccessful. After crying for about 5 minutes, I pulled her into the bed with me. I'm not sure if being in the bassinet is harder on her or me! How do I transition an infant to a bassinet when she seems completely uninterested in it? Am I stuck sleeping with her until she gets a bit older? I love having her in the bed with me, I just need her out for the sake of my neck and shoulders.

Do you have a crib you could sidecar to your bed?

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Eia
Nov 5, 2003


dreamcatcherkwe posted:

Do you have a crib you could sidecar to your bed?

This, plus, do you swaddle her?

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Phooney
Dec 24, 2008


Jake is 2 weeks old today and will not have a bar of sleeping in his own cot (side-car-ing our bed). He either has to be on top of us or directly beside us and touching. Even swaddled he will find a way to scooch over. He is also a little houdini about getting out of swaddles if he doesn't want to be in them.

The only time we've had him in his own cot was when he was completely comatose drunk on milk and didn't even wake up when we put him down. He was fine then for the vast majority of the night. We're just going to keep on introducing him to the cot when he is having naps during the day and night to get him used to it, and bring him out if he gets upset. No hurry I guess... but the sleeps just aren't as good when under a baby.

He had a weigh in this morning, 3.87kg, 21% up on birth weight at 2 weeks, what a little feeding machine! I made a spreadsheet and this would seem to indicate that he will be 3.57*10^43 kg by the time he is 20 years old. We are going to need a bigger house. Unless he slows down a bit.

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