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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

Everybody talks about an Erfworld thread, but nobody does anything about it... until right now when I got bored.

free samples for teen is a webcomic written by Rob Balder and drawn by quite a few artists at this point. Erfworld is a magical land where Sides controlled by Overlords vie for control of territory in order to preserve their own existence, and everything is kind of childlike and fake-looking. Unfortunately, all the units popped to fight and be croaked in battle are very real, and the fact that everything proceeds according to something like strategy game rules (for example, you can't leave a given map quadrant unless it's your turn and you have "move" remaining) just makes it all kind of really weird and disturbing. The pastel colors and the way everybody is some kind of pop culture reference just makes it worse.

Into this playtime hellscape is summoned Parson Gotti, master goon and wargame expert, brought in from Earth as a "perfect warlord" to... well, to do a number of things. First, to conquer the world for Overlord Stanley the Plaid. Then, there's also the whole "end war forever" goal assigned to him by the mysterious and magical cabals that financed the creation of the "summon perfect warlord" spell, who also want a bunch of other things. Really, there's never a dull moment... especially because Erfworld is also full of inappropriate sexy drama and nobody on anybody's team can stop ruining everything for even a minute.

Discuss!

3d sex comics incest male female naked wrestling Rand Brittain fucked around with this message at Jan 17, 2018 around 16:11

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nimby
Nov 4, 2009

The pinnacle of cloud computing.

Here's hoping Charlie manages to break Fate and kill/incapacitate Parson, so the comic doesn't devolve into prophecies.

Or that Charlie bites it this strip, so parson is free to do whatever.

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Spiderdrake
May 12, 2001
Those who would dominate others must first dominate themselves

Can we mock how poorly run Erfworld evidently is and how amazing the amount of money it apparently makes is for what it is? Because that has been my favorite part of Erfworld for years, given the current book was kinda meandering months ago and is in a complete mire at the moment. I feel like I'm reading Bleach. Except the beardy man writes it!

I really hope the plot actually moves vaguely forward from here, we've been stuck in the same relative hour or so since like, the last kickstarter?

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Rygar201
Jan 25, 2011

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Whatever haters Xin is drawing it again, so all is right with the world.

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Can we mock how poorly run Erfworld evidently is and how amazing the amount of money it apparently makes is for what it is? Because that has been my favorite part of Erfworld for years, given the current book was kinda meandering months ago and is in a complete mire at the moment. I feel like I'm reading Bleach. Except the beardy man writes it!

I really hope the plot actually moves vaguely forward from here, we've been stuck in the same relative hour or so since like, the last kickstarter?

WTF is this poo poo and how in the hell is this actually making money?

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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

Erfworld is good and cool. Whether it is actually making any money I don't know, since it has to pay like three people at this point.

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Rygar201
Jan 25, 2011

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They get like 2600 a week for it, split some kind of way, plus ads and Amazon affiliate income.

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Spiderdrake
May 12, 2001
Those who would dominate others must first dominate themselves

I have no idea if it is profitable, but the payment for the artists comes out of the last two kickstarters. Then it has the patreon thing he used kickstarter money to develop on-site, then it has merch too? And ads and affiliate action?

Speaking of merch, did people get their calendars on time? I was pretty tempted to buy one, but some of the pinups are pretty meh.

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Jun 6, 2011

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Here's hoping Charlie manages to break Fate and kill/incapacitate Parson, so the comic doesn't devolve into prophecies.

Or that Charlie bites it this strip, so parson is free to do whatever.

I'd have enjoyed if it had turned out that Charlie's fight against Fate was legitimately the Greater Good and Parson had decided to put past grudges aside and turn to his side for real.

Sadly that looks like it isn't going to be the case. Instead it seems Charlie conveniently forgot about the portal defence setup just long enough to move the plot ahead.

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reignonyourparade
Nov 15, 2012


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I have no idea if it is profitable, but the payment for the artists comes out of the last two kickstarters. Then it has the patreon thing he used kickstarter money to develop on-site, then it has merch too? And ads and affiliate action?

Speaking of merch, did people get their calendars on time? I was pretty tempted to buy one, but some of the pinups are pretty meh.

The patreon thing money is all redeemable for merch, I think, so its slightly less "three different revenue sources" than it seems.

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Chair In A Basket
Aug 6, 2005

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free sex amature video RIP Parson Archon whose name escapes me that will inevitably (alternatively, "is fated to") take the shots for Parson.

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Otherkinsey Scale
Jul 17, 2012



On the previous page, Marie indicated she was waiting for Lilith to come through the portal before using the scroll, so she's going to survive.

Or so I hope anyway--Lilith is my favorite character right now because, while else has been standing around, she's been Metal Gear Soliding through enemy territory under serious constraints, free nude celebrity thumbs after having her brain broken into its component parts and subsequently reformed. Hell, if it weren't for Wanda, she would've singlehandedly ended this whole conflict already.

(Either way, I don't see how Lilith could take taste your own pussy all those shots.)

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I'd have enjoyed if it had turned out that Charlie's fight against Fate was legitimately the Greater Good and Parson had decided to put past grudges aside and turn to his side for real.

Sadly that looks like it isn't going to be the case. Instead it seems Charlie conveniently forgot about the portal defence setup just long enough to move the plot ahead.

Latest comic shows that he didn't forget- we already knew that Lilith's attack on the tower has vastly slowed down how quickly he can do things with the dish, and now we know that the information just didn't get relayed to the portal team quickly enough after Parson changed sides.

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Krilion
Nov 23, 2015


Thank god. The Erfworld forums themselves are pretty terrible, just 12 pages of the exact same speculation and no discussion.

I wonder if bullets pass through a portal?

I'd say, likely, it was clear CC already planned for this exact thing and estimated losses, after all. Stanley is about to bath in gems.

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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

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I wonder if bullets pass through a portal?

Charlie's earlier comments indicate that these almost certainly will, and are in fact designed to (although they haven't been field-tested yet).

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Jan 25, 2011

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Thank god. The Erfworld forums themselves are pretty terrible, just 12 pages of the exact same speculation and no discussion.



And TV Tropes links, as far as the eye can see.

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Nov 23, 2015


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Charlie's earlier comments indicate that these almost certainly will, and are in fact designed to (although they haven't been field-tested yet).

Yeah, if you learn CC prepared for something, bet on it occuring.

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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

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I'd say, likely, it was clear CC already planned for this exact thing and estimated losses, after all. Stanley is about to bath in gems.

Is he, though? I was under the impression that part of the reason Charlie has such a huge gem hoard is so that settlements like this can't touch his actual wealth.

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Nov 23, 2015


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Is he, though? I was under the impression that part of the reason Charlie has such a huge gem hoard is so that settlements like this can't touch his actual wealth.

Not from that, from the contract breaches as the bullets hit Gobwin units

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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

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Not from that, from the contract breaches as the bullets hit Gobwin units

True, but it'll be in Schmuckers, not gems, and my impression was that Charlie had converted most of his actual wealth into gems so that this kind of "half-the-treasury" hit wouldn't ding him for as much.

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Krilion
Nov 23, 2015


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True, but it'll be in Schmuckers, not gems, and my impression was that Charlie had converted most of his actual wealth into gems so that this kind of "half-the-treasury" hit wouldn't ding him for as much.

5 million shmuckers or half the treasury of the offending side, whichever is lesser.

So...

That's a lot. If a unity turning counts as a violation, that would leave GK with 2.5 anyway.

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True, but it'll be in Schmuckers, not gems, and my impression was that Charlie had converted most of his actual wealth into gems so that this kind of "half-the-treasury" hit wouldn't ding him for as much.

For normal situations, it's a good thing. But in this case, it makes things riskier, because if he runs out of schmuckers he's gonna have to give out units which are far, far more valuable than gems.

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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

Looking back, Charlie actually already did the math for us. He says that opening fire with the tripods and mowing down Parson's group would cost him "about 140 million" plus the huge loss in social capital as the entire Magic Kingdom turns against him.

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Latest comic shows that he didn't forget- we already knew that Lilith's attack on the tower has vastly slowed down how quickly he can do things with the dish, and now we know that the information just didn't get relayed to the portal team quickly enough after Parson changed sides.

Also the baffle from Jack so that Parson walked through in Gobwin livery.

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NihilCredo
Jun 6, 2011

iram omni possibili modo preme:
plus una illa te diffamabit, quam multæ virtutes commendabunt



What *are* gems, anyway? We know that they can be mined, we know they can be converted to and from Schmuckers, and we know that they can be used to transfer cash from one side to the other (Charlie paid Slately with a big gem to finance Tramennis' heirship). Anything else?

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Jan 25, 2011

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Looking back, Charlie actually already did the math for us. He says that opening fire with the tripods and mowing down Parson's group would cost him "about 140 million" plus the huge loss in social capital as the entire Magic Kingdom turns against him.

That's if they fired and eliminated his entire retinue. I doubt the leader archon will let them fire for any longer than she has to.

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Aug 14, 2005



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Thank god. The Erfworld forums themselves are pretty terrible, just 12 pages of the exact same speculation and no discussion.

I wonder if bullets pass through a portal?

The explosion did, after all. That's how everyone (At least Marie?) in the MK got injured.


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What *are* gems, anyway? We know that they can be mined, we know they can be converted to and from Schmuckers, and we know that they can be used to transfer cash from one side to the other (Charlie paid Slately with a big gem to finance Tramennis' heirship). Anything else?

I think you summed it up. They're just valuable objects which take the place of money.

You can't just 'mine for schmuckers', you mine for valuables to turn into schmuckers. Gems we know of, though perhaps there's mineral seams which have innate value? Units pop fully armed and armored so marbits, gobwins, and other 'mining' creatures and races don't seem like they'd need to dig for useful metals, so 'gems' seems to be the primary purpose for digging for financial reasons. We've seen multiple instances of 'gems being instantly converted into schmuckers'. Have we seen the opposite? Perhaps it's more like the gems must be BOUGHT with schmuckers, and it isn't an instant conversion?



Jack is, hands down, my favorite character. I love the way he's portrayed as being the jester and the wise man at the same time. The two updates which firmly cemented him as my favorite were these two :

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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

Jack is the best character and I'm glad that being Decrypted has driven him slightly crazier but has not made this basic fact less true.

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Sep 2, 2006
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Have we seen the opposite? Perhaps it's more like the gems must be BOUGHT with schmuckers, and it isn't an instant conversion?



I think Moneymancers can turn Schmuckers into gems; didn't Ben refuse to do that to send money to Slately?

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Otherkinsey Scale
Jul 17, 2012



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We've seen multiple instances of 'gems being instantly converted into schmuckers'. Have we seen the opposite? Perhaps it's more like the gems must be BOUGHT with schmuckers, and it isn't an instant conversion?


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I think Moneymancers can turn Schmuckers into gems; didn't Ben refuse to do that to send money to Slately?

Yeah, it was established somewhere that while gems could instantly be turned into schmuckers, turning schmuckers into gems requires Moneymancy.

The different 'mancies are one of my favorite things in this comic, incidentally, because they started off as this jokey chart, and now we get to see people talk about them and their deep inner workings. And we've still seen barely anything out of like half the disciplines, too.

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reignonyourparade
Nov 15, 2012


Rob has confirmed that no lava or debris went through the gobwin knob portal from decrypting the volcano, so it seems like Charlie has actively carnymancied the portal into not behaving how it ought to.

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nimby
Nov 4, 2009

The pinnacle of cloud computing.

He's attuned to the dish, so he's bound to have world-breaking powers on par with Decrypt. Access to all sorts of crucial communication and 'game upkeep' channels has to have given him a very deep understanding of Erfworld. I do wonder what an attuned Arkenhammer does. Remake the world into walnuts?

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Rand Brittain
Mar 24, 2013

"Go on until you're stopped."

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He's attuned to the dish, so he's bound to have world-breaking powers on par with Decrypt. Access to all sorts of crucial communication and 'game upkeep' channels has to have given him a very deep understanding of Erfworld. I do wonder what an attuned Arkenhammer does. Remake the world into walnuts?

Stanley erotic sex for couples is attuned to the Arkenhammer, although given what we've seen the dish and pliers do, it's becoming increasingly likely that it has powers beyond rocking out, shooting lightning, and taming dwagons.

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Stanley horse sex porn pics is attuned to the Arkenhammer, although given what we've seen the dish and pliers do, it's becoming increasingly likely that it has powers beyond rocking out, shooting lightning, and taming dwagons.

Stanley is bar none the most potent single unit we've seen in combat, iirc. The Hammer is certainly mighty, though it having additional powers is a very safe bet. It's possible that the Tools aren't put their best use without being attuned to a caster of some sort.

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The pinnacle of cloud computing.

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Stanley sex with black lady is attuned to the Arkenhammer, although given what we've seen the dish and pliers do, it's becoming increasingly likely that it has powers beyond rocking out, shooting lightning, and taming dwagons.

Oh yeah, I forgot. He's just been so mundane, not being a caster.

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Krilion
Nov 23, 2015


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Oh yeah, I forgot. He's just been so mundane, not being a caster.

I think we really forget his capability. He doesn't do combat because it could end badly, but dwagons are supposedly ridiculously powerful.They could siege a lvl 5 pretty easy, and Parson wasn't excited to give any to CC. Now they can dance battle.

There's a reason he was promoted to an heir afterall - and he even sacked Faq with little effort. It's the kind of thing that the rest of the game has likely planned around, using tons of AA to deal with the Dwagons OP meta (at least neighbors). That's why Jillian was so instrumental in both battles.

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I'd like to point out that we've also never seen Stanley in a situation where he's being serious in combat? Even when he was ambushed on the way to Faq, he was distracted by Jack. It's possible we've just never seen him in a mood that's the right combination of creative and pissed off to break out the free porn full movie real powers.

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I'd like to point out that we've also never seen Stanley in a situation where he's being serious in combat? Even when he was ambushed on the way to Faq, he was distracted by Jack. It's possible we've just never seen him in a mood that's the right combination of creative and pissed off to break out the pussy licking porn clips real powers.

Or maybe he just thinks the other powers are dumb/useless and never even mentions them.

It cracks nuts, and like every 10th one becomes a dove. He though that was sorta neat.

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reignofevil
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I'd like to point out that we've also never seen Stanley in a situation where he's being serious in combat? Even when he was ambushed on the way to Faq, he was distracted by Jack. It's possible we've just never seen him in a mood that's the right combination of creative and pissed off to break out the myley cyrus naked pics real powers.

Or maybe he just thinks the other powers are dumb/useless and never even mentions them.

I haven't read anything since book 2 ended but I vaguely recall a text update where he said he was going to maybe learn how his powers actually worked beyond lightning; dwagons; walnuts and rocking out.

So I'd say he has absolutely no idea what he can or can't do.

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