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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



Hello goonlings and welcome to the 2017 Book Barn Secret Santa! We had fun last year so I'm hoping this year will be another success with lots of goons sending each other books for Christmas. Check out nude girls in video

Sound fun? Well, a secret santa is a pretty straightforward idea, but this OP goes into detail to make it as simple as possible for me and because this is about real personal information and money. So, if you're interested, vintage classic porn video read this whole post first and ask if you've got any questions. Then you can sign up by posting in this thread and emailing bondage sex free movies. Please put your username in the subject line. I'll reply to confirm you're in the Santa, so if I don't reply, send me another email – no reply means you're not in. You have until guy girl sex videos Monday 20th November to sign up.

free naked girl movie What to post in the thread
The kinds of books you'd like or not like, and if an e-book or audiobook present is okay – if so, say what equipment you've got. Be explicit; your Santa may be a Luddite. Also add anything else you'd like to be public, such as your goodreads profile or whatever.

When you email me, include the following information:
sex and lucia nude Username: Please put this in your email's subject line.
black naked lesbian girls Real Name and Address: I'll need to tell your Santa your real name and the address you want stuff sent to (including the country). If you're in a non-English speaking country, please send me your address in both English and your local language.
videos porno gratis y Postage: Your country, regional, or worldwide OK. See below for more information.
free gothic sex videos Anything else: Anything else I or your Santa might need to know that you want to be private, for instance, good local bookshops/websites to order from, or people you don't want to be matched with.

nude art class model What to get your match
The idea of the Secret Santa is to spread joy and love. Do your best to get your match something that they will enjoy. There are two big guidelines. One, lyrics for pussy monster read their sign-up post. Two, the present should be worth roughly demi moore sex tapes the cost of a new hardback novel in your country – about US$25. This is important. Nobody should feel cheated when their Santa sends them something much less than they sent. Apart from that, it's all good. You can look at last year's thread for ideas. You don't have to just give your match one book. Nor do they have to be new, just good as new. Book-related things are also cool; a little extra unrelated to books, is fine too. Try to surprise your match – that's part of the fun! A book token is boring, so don't send that. Remember that your match may already have the book you sent them, so get a gift receipt if possible – this may not work across international borders, etc, but is a nice idea.

free pic nude girls Can anyone join in?
To join, you must be an actively posting goon with an account at least six months old and at least one post outside the thread so we know you're not trying to join4books. If you aren't, but someone can vouch for you, you're in. Just ask them to email meeting people for sex saying you're a good sort.

You must be willing to let me, Hieronymus Alloy (who will also have access to the gmail account), and your Santa know your real name and address. You must also be willing to provide some extra information, such as phone number or email, if the Post Office needs it to deliver to you. bay to breakers nude Obviously, this is all personal information. You must not use it outside of the Secret Santa – only to send your present. I will only use it to match goons up and tell Santas where to post their stuff.

Two more things. First, sending ebooks/audiobooks internationally may be an issue, so you must be willing to accept a physical present. Secondly, this is a commitment. If you're about to have a baby, be sued for everything you own, or otherwise have trouble fulfilling that commitment, please think twice before joining in. There's always next year. Unless you're terminally ill, but then you've got bigger problems.

amature teen fuck videos Postage
Postage charges come on top of the cost of the presents. Do not spend $5 on a present and $20 on postage! I advise you to post early or order online from a shop in your match's country to make it cheaper. Presents should arrive by Saturday December 23rd, so post yours by Saturday December 9th at the latest to ensure they arrive for Christmas, and earlier if possible. Postage on time and in good condition is your responsibility. You can also avoid all this trouble by sending an ebook or audiobook gift if your match is happy with that.

I will try to arrange things so that postage is as easy as possible. Last year I arranged goons into regions (North America, Europe, Pacific) and people sent gifts within those regions. If this is OK with you, please describe your postage as hard core ass porn regional when you email me. If you're rich, organised, and up for posting anywhere in the world, say bam margera porn video worldwide OK. If you're only ready to post things within your country, say student sex scandal video [my country] only. If you're in the USA, this shouldn't be a problem. In any other country, it might just be, so consider plugging this Secret Santa in a regional thread or somewhere you know other people from your country post. If it looks like there might be issues with postage, I'll be in touch before signups end.

free solo porn videos What exactly to do in step-by-step detail
1. Finish reading this whole post and ask any questions you have in the thread.

2. Post in this thread saying you're in, as above. Then bookmark the thread.

3. Email i like a sex, as above, and get a confirmation email.

4. Signups will close on Monday 20th November. Before Thursday 24th Novmeber, I'll email you with your match's information. You should then read their post and think of about US$25 worth of stuff they'd like.

5. Post it to them. Label the present as being part of the Secret Santa so they know what it is. You must post by Saturday December 9th, the earlier the better, and take a photo of your proof of postage. You don't need to show me, but if your present is late it'll be useful to prove that you did, in fact, send a present. Then, post in the thread that you've sent the present. If you sent ebooks, post in the thread too.

6. When your present arrives, post in the thread so I and your Santa know it arrived safely.

7. You don't have to open it at once, but when you do, post photos and thank your Santa. This is a rule, not a suggestion.

8. When your match posts to say thank you, step forward and take a bow, or at least post to say you were glad they liked it.

9. Your present should arrive by Saturday December 23rd at the latest – if not, let me know and I'll check with your Santa. This is why you need proof of postage.

10. If you have a problem with anything, please get in touch with me or the mod ASAP.

lil kim shows pussy Anything else?
Pop quiz: How much should your gift be worth, and when should it reach your match? If you can't answer these questions, read the post again.

If you might have to email you about something – if so, please reply ASAP so as not to hold everyone else up, or delay your own present. If someone vanishes I'd rather cut them out than delay everyone.

If you'd like to be involved without receiving anything, you can sign up as a backup Santa. If they don't get anything, you'll be the one to make sure they do. This didn't happen last year and it's unlikely to, but if you'd like to do this, feel free. If you would like to send extra Christmas presents to everyone, like last year's sex magick pdfs from CestMoi, please get in touch! It was super cool of him to do this and I'd be delighted to make it happen again. If it does, I'll post in the thread and participants must tell me they want it by email or PMs. You don't get it automatically.

If you need to contact your match, please do so via me, and I'll pass a message on to them.

It's unlikely to happen, but if you mess up, expect the moderator's wrath, depending on how grievous a sin you have committed. Obviously if something is delayed, lost, or damaged in the post that's not your fault.

Please tell other subforums and threads about this!

free streaming video porn The most important thing...
I know there's a lot of rules here, but they're purely to prevent drama. Hopefully it'll come down to nothing more complex than “give your match a nice present well in time for Christmas”. Don't sweat it.

Merry Christmas everyone!

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



This year's gallery of Christmas cheer:

Pleiades gave Franchescanado:

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Santaman came to town early!



Thanks to my Santa! Lots of love!

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This book has been on my eye for quite a while. Thanks very much to Pleiades for a fun science book!

TheManFromFOXHOUND gave Pleiades:

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I got a nice letter, three books, and a picture of a baby girl! Thank you, Santa!

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Safety Biscuits gave cryptoclastic:

cryptoclastic gave USMC_Karl:

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Man, you are the best secret santa gift giver. Another book that I wanted to read but would never buy for myself, porno lilo y estich Free Country: A Penniless Adventure the Length of Britain, and a total unknown book that sounds very interesting indeed, free naruto sex video Perfume: The Story of a Murderer.

USMC_Karl gave Megabound:

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My present just got delivered, thanks, Santa!



These all look great, and I'm looking forward to getting into that Vonnegut especially!

Chocolate Milk gave Military Cervix:


Bilirubin gave TheBoat:

TheBoat gave TheManFromFOXHOUND:

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Thanks TheBoat! I love all these, especially the giant size Nietzsche! Where did you even find those?

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Megabound
Oct 20, 2012



I'm in again! Last year was a blast and I've been working my way through the gigantic stack of books Safety Biscuits sent me since

I'm open to most things that aren't space-opera sci-fi or tolkenesque fantasy. Favorite books I've read this year have been A Canticle for Leibowitz, Spring Snow and No Longer Human. I enjoy strong religious undertones, discussion and allegory but by no means let that bind you.

I've just cleaned up my Goodreads, so I don't own anything on my to-read list, if you get stuck feel free to choose from here but I'd prefer something I don't know about : sex and big dick

The one book on my list you shouldn't get me is Under Satan's Sun, as my wife is trying to track down a copy for me herself.

I also have a kindle, and a digital book would be fine, but not preferred. Happy to receive pre-loved books as well, and books from any era.

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TheBoat
Aug 25, 2017


I'm in! Mainly fantasy, sci-fi and manga. I do not have a goodreads account but will edit when I get one setup. I am currently reading game of thrones and just recently finished The fifth season by N.K Jemsin and really enjoyed it. Only started seriously reading as a hobby recently. I have a kindle fire but would prefer to not receive audio books as is not my forte just yet. Paper(new or used) and e books are fine. Overall if you've read something sci-fi or fantasy and thought it was a good story it will probably be a good choice for me. If any further questions feel free to ask mod and we can correspond. Merry santa-mas exchange thing!


Also would prefer no religion. TIA.


As you can tell from my Goodreads account: free schoolgirl porn pics I haven't read very many books. Any good books I do not know about are completely on the table(More to the point sci-fi and fantasy)



Edit: Words and link

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Chocolate Milk
May 7, 2008

More tea, Wesley?

I'm in! I love books, and surprise books sounds awesome (as does getting to buy books for someone!).

I like books that have humour and that make me think. Favourite genres include sci-fi & fantasy, crime/thriller/mystery, historical (fiction/non-fiction), and economics/science books written for non-economists/non-scientists.

I would prefer paperbooks, or audiobooks (I haven't tried them yet but I was thinking recently I'd like to get into them). New or used is fine.

I have a Goodreads profile but don't want to widely share it so I will send it in my email. I've put almost all things I've read over the last few years on there (I just need to update it with recent books) so it should give you a pretty good idea of what I have read recently.

e: I should mention, I do have a Kindle so e-books are definitely an option if that works best.

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USMC_Karl
Nov 17, 2003

SUPPORTER OF THE REINSTATED LAWFUL HAWAIIAN GOVERNMENT. HAOLES GET OFF DA `AINA.

This sounds like a lot of fun, so I'm in.

I'm down for just about any kind of book. I'm a big sucker for fun, pulpy books, but am slowly opening myself up to other kinds of books. You can check my goodreads profile little pussy free porn and take a gander at what I've read, how I rated it, and my to-read list to (hopefully) get an idea of the kinds of stuff I like. With that said, I would definitely prefer something unknown and maybe a little challenging. Feel free to toss any book at me that you thought was a mind-blowingly good read. I'm not really open to graphic novels though.

Some books that I loved: The Hyperion Cantos by Dan Simmons, anything and everything Stephen King, I loved My Life and Hard Times by Thurbur, but haven't read any of his other work, The Sympathizer by Nguyen, Zorba the Greek by Kazantzakis.

Some books that I didn't like: A Head Full of Ghosts, The Vegetatian by Han Kang, Foreigner by C.J. Cherryh

I live abroad, but am American and have a Kindle, so ebooks are fine. I also have an audible subscription, so audiobooks are fine too. If you are going to go through the trouble of getting an actual physical book, I'm open to anything at all but would definitely prefer a new or used hardback.

tl;dr list:

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Fun reads
Serieses
Fiction

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Overly pretentious prose (e.g. if the comma-per-sentence count is over 4 or 5 on average or you need a thesaurus, I probably won't like it)
Dry reads

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Nonfiction

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



I changed the name of "international OK" postage to "worldwide ok" to reinforce the fact that you might end up posting anywhere in the world. I'm not going to abuse this if you sign up for it, but there's a possibility we'll have one guy sign up with nobody nearby and I'll need to cover a gap. If you want to change what you wrote, email me.

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Pleiades
Aug 20, 2006


I'm in because I finally started reading again after hard drive failure months ago.

Here is my Goodreads profile: healthy food for sex

Fantasy and Science Fiction are the favored genres.

As you can see, R Scott Bakker is the most read author(for NOW) and I was utterly traumatized and am STILL angry over what happened to a certain someone in the Unholy Consult. watch free anal porn Nersei Proyas and betrayal/death he went through. Ideally, I would like books that include characters similar to him.

I am not fond of audiobooks.

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freelop
Apr 28, 2013

Where we're going, we won't need fries to see


This was great last year so I'm in again.
I like mainly sci-fi and fantasy but I'd quite like something that the santa either holds as a special book to them or is just one they feel people should read.
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Bilirubin
Feb 16, 2014

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Bleak Gremlin

I too had fun with this last year and am in again.

I will get my Goodreads edited to remove books from my "want to read" list I already own.

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Edit: I'm a little behind on current SciFi and am just getting into horror. History is a good bet too. Love literature. Do not buy me science related nonfiction please and thank you.

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USMC_Karl
Nov 17, 2003

SUPPORTER OF THE REINSTATED LAWFUL HAWAIIAN GOVERNMENT. HAOLES GET OFF DA `AINA.

Just browsing around through the good reads profiles of everyone that has posted thus far and realized that a few of you only have a couple books listed up there. I have a couple good ideas for gifts and all of them seem to be pretty safe, but what exactly happens if I get someone a book that they already have?

As a secondary question, one of my idea books comes in paperback and electronic format which are <$10, but the hardback starts at something crazy like $400. If I were to, say, buy two or three books for whomever I'm buying a gift for, would that be kosher? As long as the price is at/near $25, that is.

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Bilirubin
Feb 16, 2014

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Bleak Gremlin

Speaking for myself, I have a few decades of books never logged on Goodreads that I suppose I could spend an hour going over my shelves and get into the database, but were you to get me something I had already read, it is likely so long ago it would be a good prompt to read it again!

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Megabound
Oct 20, 2012



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As a secondary question, one of my idea books comes in paperback and electronic format which are <$10, but the hardback starts at something crazy like $400. If I were to, say, buy two or three books for whomever I'm buying a gift for, would that be kosher? As long as the price is at/near $25, that is.

Take a look at what people got in the last thread. If it's in the budget and a book, or books, it's fine. Last year I got 20 slim volumes from a penguin collection and it was perfect.

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



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Just browsing around through the good reads profiles of everyone that has posted thus far and realized that a few of you only have a couple books listed up there. I have a couple good ideas for gifts and all of them seem to be pretty safe, but what exactly happens if I get someone a book that they already have?

Read your match's post, use your common sense, and hope for the best. This is why you should put lots of details in your sign up post! But don't sweat it; there's a lot of books in the world and you're unlikely to give your match something they already have unless it's jessica rabbit cartoon porn Hamlet. If you do, well, that's just bad luck. Try to include a gift receipt if possible, but there's only so much you can do and if you're acting in good faith, you won't get in any kind of trouble.

quote:

As a secondary question, one of my idea books comes in paperback and electronic format which are <$10, but the hardback starts at something crazy like $400. If I were to, say, buy two or three books for whomever I'm buying a gift for, would that be kosher? As long as the price is at/near $25, that is.

Buying multiple books is fine, it's in the op. Look at last year's thread if you want ideas.

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USMC_Karl
Nov 17, 2003

SUPPORTER OF THE REINSTATED LAWFUL HAWAIIAN GOVERNMENT. HAOLES GET OFF DA `AINA.

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Buying multiple books is fine, it's in the op. Look at last year's thread if you want ideas.

No it's no....

the op posted:

You don't have to just give your match one book.



My bad, I swear to god I read the op top to bottom a couple of times just to make sure that I'd be able to do it all. Shows how much reading comprehension I have.

Yeah, I figure that the chance for overlap is relatively small, but it never hurts to be safe. I'll definitely add in a little more detail to hopefully key people into what I like and make it easier for them to tell what I probably have.

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Franchescanado
Feb 23, 2013

If it wasn't for disappointment,
I wouldn't have any appointment.


Grimey Drawer

I'm in! I had a fun time last year, and I'm even more financially stable this year.

lesbian teacher fucking student shelves. If a book is on that list, that means I own it. It's up-to-date and everything.

paris hilton licking pussy and free star porn videos list, and a free naked female wrestling. I own all the Thomas Pynchon books on the kindle list, they're just there so I can (eventually) have kindle versions as well. I'd prefer to get physical books for this, though.

I like post-modern lit, classics, and modern literature. If it gets discussed in the Literature Thread, I'll probably dig it. I also really enjoy horror and mysteries (especially detective fiction). I also really like short story and/or poetry collections and anthologies. Not a huge sci-fi fan and I don't like fantasy or romance. I'm open to anything new; I've been in a reading rut all year and I'd like to energize my reading habits somehow. I like weird, unusual, surreal, absurd, etc. I can totally read hosed up books and depressing books.

I also like non-fiction books that explore literary theory, mythologies, etc. I also like non-fiction books that explore art, the weird side of history, the weird side of culture (like Jon Ronson), etc.

Authors I like: Thomas Pynchon, Etgar Keret, Orhan Pamuk, Richard Farina, the Beats, Stephen King, John Irving, Vonnegut, Flannery O' Conner, Nabakov, George Saunders, Jon Ronson, DFW...

Favorite books: who is tiffany teen Inherent Vice by Thomas Pynchon, naked black college girls Been Down So Long It Looks Like Up To Me by Richard Farina, free asian porn vedio A Prayer for Owen Meany by Irving, sex clip pamela anderson Pale Fire by Nabakov, galilea montijo porn videos Lincoln in the Bardo by Saunders, college girls phone sex Complete Short Stories of Flannery O'Conner,

Also, I'm a US Goon.

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010




Now someone else will see the posts and won't have to ask

Just as a reminder, if you've been in a Secret Santa before, you still have to email me your details or you're not in the Santa! I need to know!

Meanwhile, I just made women addicted to porn to post your bookshelves to definitively answer whether your match has that book you're thinking of getting him.

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cryptoclastic
Jul 3, 2003

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I am in! I did this a few years ago and got some great books. Then I signed up the following year and it didn't happen, unfortunately.

trophy wives naked truth is my Goodreads profile, with books I've read or want to read. I don't necessarily want anything from my "to read" however, and am willing to try new things.

I enjoy fantasy books, although they've been boring lately. New or weird settings would be cool, like the Master Li books. Random books I've enjoyed recently were Perfume by Patrick Suskind, The Color Purple by Alice Walker, and Human Acts by Han Kang. I also loved East of Eden when I read it last year.

Overall, I will read anything. These days I find myself preferring shorter books (under 500 pages) but I'm interested to see what Santa has in store for me!

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USMC_Karl
Nov 17, 2003

SUPPORTER OF THE REINSTATED LAWFUL HAWAIIAN GOVERNMENT. HAOLES GET OFF DA `AINA.

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Meanwhile, I just made sex in sex forum to post your bookshelves to definitively answer whether your match has that book you're thinking of getting him.

I posted my digital library in this thread so whomever ends up being my secret santa can easily search for a book's title and see if I have it or not.

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CestMoi
Sep 16, 2011



I'll send fun books to anyone that takes part again

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A human heart
Oct 10, 2012



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I'll send fun books to anyone that takes part again

You should send them to me and not do the secret santa

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CestMoi
Sep 16, 2011



I can send weird books to you too if you want, a human heart.

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



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I'll send fun books to anyone that takes part again

Thank you very much!

For anyone who didn't get them last year, CestMoi put together a weird stocking-filler anthology to everyone who said they wanted one. Mine had a Tang Dynasty poem, a hangover cure, and an Englishwoman's probably-fictional account of meeting tantric cults in Tibet, or something. I have no idea what's going to be in them, but please email me if you want one. A human heart, I see you don't have PMs so feel free to email me too.

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A human heart
Oct 10, 2012



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Thank you very much!

For anyone who didn't get them last year, CestMoi put together a weird stocking-filler anthology to everyone who said they wanted one. Mine had a Tang Dynasty poem, a hangover cure, and an Englishwoman's probably-fictional account of meeting tantric cults in Tibet, or something. I have no idea what's going to be in them, but please email me if you want one. A human heart, I see you don't have PMs so feel free to email me too.

I was just making a joke with my posting pal CestMoi, I actually have too many books already

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CestMoi
Sep 16, 2011



I'm doing this specifically so the inordinate amount of books I download and never read is in some way justified

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nefarias bredd
May 4, 2013


I did this last year and am definitely up for it again! I'm only a (very very) sporadic poster here but I love books/reading. I keep a wishlist on Goodreads (shelves to-read and follow-up-reading) and I'll honestly read pretty much anything:

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I use LibraryThing to catalogue stuff I own or have read:
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So if it's on LT, I've got it.

Books I've really liked this last year: The Power, Neapolitan Novels, The Thing Around Your Neck, Not the End of the World, The Vegetarian.

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TheBoat
Aug 25, 2017


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I'm doing this specifically so the inordinate amount of books I download and never read is in some way justified

How do I jump in on this stocking--filler-train?

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TheManFromFOXHOUND
Nov 5, 2011


I had a great time last year so count me in.

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This year I've really gotten into poetry, and I would love to get some more modern poetry collections. If you're not sure what kind of poetry is good or if you think all poetry is fart-huffing garbage, I'm also into all kinds of literature (classics, modern, and post-modern), and I wouldn't say no to some genuinely thoughtful sci-fi/fantasy. Non-fiction would also be great. I enjoy history and philosophy, and honestly I'm feeling like I don't have enough philosophy books right now.

I'd prefer physical books and used books are great, especially with margin notes from the previous owner.

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



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How do I jump in on this stocking--filler-train?

Email me. I'll remind everyone when signups go out too.

I'm in the Secret Santa too. You can see accessories for teen girls in the booklord thread. The list is, like my cock, risibly short, but I hope I'll have more reading time next year. (And here's ex wife sex tape.)

You can see I'm more into literature and nonfiction, but I'm easy within those guidelines; I'm particularly into history and I've just started reading criticism. I can get classic stuff and the latest releases here, so something a bit more obscure or a few years old would be nice. The best books I read this year were fake celeb porn sites 100 Years of Solitude, free porn movie hd The Man with the Compound Eyes, and long hentai porn videos The Motion of Light in Water, but don't think you bear naked banana nut have to look for magic realism about gay black people in NYC.

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Dec 24, 2006
Hey guys

I'm in! It was fun last year, should be fun this time around too. I'm open to most things, but I'm lukewarm on fantasy/sci-fi. Fiction or nonfiction are both fine, and classics from whichever country you're from would be awesome.

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



Sign-ups are now closed. I'll send you your match in a day or two.

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USMC_Karl
Nov 17, 2003

SUPPORTER OF THE REINSTATED LAWFUL HAWAIIAN GOVERNMENT. HAOLES GET OFF DA `AINA.

Stoked, this should be fun.

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Safety Biscuits
Oct 21, 2010



Matches have been sent out!

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Stoked, this should be fun.

Actually it's really boring, I only tell people it's fun to get them to join in. Sorry about that.

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NTRabbit
Aug 15, 2012

i wear this armour to protect myself from the histrionics of hysterical women

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Last year was really cool, but I'm not doing so well financially right now, so had to give it a miss. Enjoy your books goons, I'll try and be back for next year!

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USMC_Karl
Nov 17, 2003

SUPPORTER OF THE REINSTATED LAWFUL HAWAIIAN GOVERNMENT. HAOLES GET OFF DA `AINA.

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I'll send fun books to anyone that takes part again

I got my assignment and am currently thinking about what to send. I'm totally down for receiving fun books *if* you don't mind shipping them to me. I live in South Korea and will totally understand if that is too far/too much of a pain in the rear end to do.

*edit* nevermind, it looks like the fun books have already been taken care of.

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Bilirubin
Feb 16, 2014

The sanctioned action is to porn wallpapers for phone CHUG!!!


Bleak Gremlin

Message received sir

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The Grey
Mar 2, 2004



Dang... I was too slow and missed out on this. I had a lot of fun with doing it previous years.

If you need a sub for some reason, I'm available to jump in.

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Pleiades
Aug 20, 2006


I sent my presents a few days. The giftee should now have most of them. One more will be arriving early December.

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Chocolate Milk
May 7, 2008

More tea, Wesley?

Done! Parcels sent.

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Franchescanado
Feb 23, 2013

If it wasn't for disappointment,
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Grimey Drawer

Santaman came to town early!



Looks like a fun urban noir horror, a character driven literary novel, and a literary mystery! Can't wait to dig in. The Devil You Know seems like a fun book to read over the holidays.

Thanks to my Santa! Lots of love!

My Santee should expect theirs soon.

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