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Fart City
Dec 17, 2016

Oh, well, that's all water under the bridge, as I always say. Water under the bridge!


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Played by a fantastic actor too, Robert Carlyle. Check out naked female mud wrestling Ravenous for an idea of how great Carlyle could've been as a Bond villain if they hadn't completely wasted him.

Oh dear sir, I know that film all too well. Very near and dear to my heart. Really that’s kind of what I wanted in TWINE: just one scene like the Tom And Jerry antics featured at the end of Ravenous. Keep it PG-13, yes, but have Bond throw absolutely everything he can at Renard, just to see it shrugged off.

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It makes sense, considering the twist of the movie is Elektra King being the main antagonist, with him fulfilling the "Jaws" role of henchman. Well, one of the fifteen hundred twists. TWINE's biggest problem was that there's all the elements of a good Bond movie there, along with three other movies, and they're very clumsily jammed together.

That’s true, but it almost makes it more egregious that he doesn’t have a more notable action scene. The fight at the end is whatever, but it doesn’t nearly come close to taking advantage of the unique characteristics of the antagonist.

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Unmature
May 9, 2008


Die Another Day is one of the worst movies ever made but is incredibly watchable. I'd sit down for that for the fourth time before I watch a lot of Moore's for the second or third (even though he's my second fave Bond).

I was at a convention with some friends a few years ago and we were about to leave in the morning when we noticed it was halfway through on TV. We finished it and got to the con late.

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exquisite tea
Apr 21, 2007

Carly shook her glass, willing the ice to melt. "You still haven't told me what the mission is."

She leaned forward. "We are going to assassinate the bad men of Hollywood."

The We Hate Movies podcast on Die Another Day is really great, of course it’s hard not to laugh at someone simply reciting the major plot points of Die Another Day.

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Wandle Cax
Dec 15, 2006


The World is not Enough is a delightful watch because of Sophie Marceau quite frankly

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R. Guyovich
Dec 25, 1991


Who is the best Bond villain. Answers must begin with "Rosa" and end with "Klebb."

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Barudak
May 7, 2007



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Who is the best Bond villain. Answers must begin with "Rosa" and end with "Klebb."

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Cacator
Aug 6, 2005

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Who is the best Bond villain. Answers must begin with "Rosa" and end with "Klebb."

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May 9, 2008


Christopher Walken

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

Fancy.


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Who is the best Bond villain. Answers must begin with "Rosa" and end with "Klebb."

The Donald Pleasence version of Blofeld.

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esperterra
Mar 24, 2010

There are no such things as miracles.




Y'know what song needs more love? Tomorrow Never Dies.

In fact all of the Brosnan movies had great songs. One might even say GoldenEye is the best of all of the Bond songs .......

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

Fancy.


Obviously the quality varies, but on the whole, I think it's easier to list the ones that maria carry naked pics aren't any good. "All Time High" from sex position photo gallery Octopussy is probably my least favourite because it's too muzak.

"For Your Eyes Only" is a good song except it needed a singer with a stronger voice than Sheena Easton to sing it. They should've got Shirley Bassey to sing that one instead of "Moonraker" (which I think is the least of the three she did for the series).

I have a lot of affection for "Nobody Does It Better" but that ties in together with the entire opening sequence of best damn porn ever The Spy Who Loved Me with the Union jack parachute.

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Dec 23, 2006

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Craig saying that he wants to do one more Bond because he wants to "go out on a high note" made me smile, because it makes it very clear that even the star thought Spectre wasn't one.

Craig's had a really, really miserable time on two of his four movies. Quantum of Solace was a second-draft script that they were shooting, and eventually Forster and Craig were rewriting the drat thing themselves in-between takes. On Spectre, they went into filming with a script that was being rewritten daily on the set, and Craig shredded his knee filming a fight scene (and he also tore his rotator cuff on either Quantum or Skyfall).

And holy moly, that original script for Spectre is utterly unbelievable in how terrible it is.

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Basebf555
Feb 29, 2008

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Who is the best Bond villain. Answers must begin with "Rosa" and end with "Klebb."

Right movie but wrong villain old man.

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Jun 20, 2004
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Obviously the quality varies, but on the whole, I think it's easier to list the ones that salma hayek nude boobs aren't any good. "All Time High" from naruto see hinata naked Octopussy is probably my least favourite because it's too muzak.

"For Your Eyes Only" is a good song except it needed a singer with a stronger voice than Sheena Easton to sing it. They should've got Shirley Bassey to sing that one instead of "Moonraker" (which I think is the least of the three she did for the series).

I have a lot of affection for "Nobody Does It Better" but that ties in together with the entire opening sequence of free porn losing virginity The Spy Who Loved Me with the Union jack parachute.

The best Bond song is View to A Kill, with Living Daylights right behind it.

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Sep 12, 2003



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Craig's had a really, really miserable time on two of his four movies. Quantum of Solace was a second-draft script that they were shooting, and eventually Forster and Craig were rewriting the drat thing themselves in-between takes. On Spectre, they went into filming with a script that was being rewritten daily on the set, and Craig shredded his knee filming a fight scene (and he also tore his rotator cuff on either Quantum or Skyfall).

And holy moly, that original script for Spectre is utterly unbelievable in how terrible it is.

The original script is worse than "I'm the author of all your pain, James?" Spectre had one of the clunkiest scripts I've ever had the pleasure of watching actors try to deliver - M telling C "Now we know what C stands for" is fine, but then they add "...careless" to it and kept it in the movie! Like, that's 100% a line you shoot and go "we'll see if it works!" and quietly delete the negatives of, not keep in the finished product.

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R. Guyovich
Dec 25, 1991


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Right movie but wrong villain old man.

red grant is a close second.

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Tenzarin
Jul 24, 2007

Let me sing you a song.


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I forgot how many dumb titles this series has, I was thinking of Die Another Day when talking about Tomorrow Never Dies.

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Dec 23, 2006

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The original script is worse than "I'm the author of all your pain, James?"

Oh, yes.

-- Blofeld was a woman, who gets literally shot in the head, in cold blood, by Bond (Barbara Broccoli gave "fire and fury" a new definition when she read this)
-- Tanner was in cahoots with C and Blofeld (and at one point Q was, as well)
-- M gets kidnapped multiple times
-- The script was written explicitly as Bond's retirement mission (Broccoli also threw a fit at this, as did Amy Pascal)
-- There's literally a 20-minute highway chase scene in the third act
-- The evil SPECTRE plan is to cause a blackout during a NATO event in England (uh...), but Bond has a magic document that will reveal C's involvement with Blofeld and expose the false-flag conspiracy

It was a disaster, Sony was like "uh, dudes, we can't shoot this, this is terrible," so they were rewriting on-set through essentially the entire production.

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

Fancy.


It's kind of weird how arguably the most famous screenwriter who's worked on James Bond movies was Roald Dahl.

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esperterra
Mar 24, 2010

There are no such things as miracles.




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It's kind of weird how arguably the most famous screenwriter who's worked on James Bond movies was Roald Dahl.

It's less weird when you consider Ian Fleming wrote Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

e: oh hey, which dahl also worked on the screenplay for how did I not know that

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Payndz
Sep 22, 2006

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So I twatted them with a magic yo-yo. Because, hell, why not?


How Purvis and Wade have kept their writing gig on the series (everything from TWINE onwards) when all their scripts have been flawed at best and poo poo at worst is a mystery.

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

Fancy.


The only other Bond screenwriter who I feel like has reasonably immediate name recognition (someone may correct me on this) is probably George Macdonald Fraser.

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LesterGroans
Jun 9, 2009

It's funny...

You were so scary at night.


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-- Blofeld was a woman, who gets literally shot in the head, in cold blood, by Bond (Barbara Broccoli gave "fire and fury" a new definition when she read this)

Hahaha that's one way to respond to the criticism of that Skyfall scene, I guess.

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Violator
May 15, 2003



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Hahaha that's one way to respond to the criticism of that Skyfall scene, I guess.

I don’t remember, which one?

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

Fancy.


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I don’t remember, which one?

I suspect it's the one where Silva challenges Bond to shoot something off the Bond girl's head like William Tell and Bond (despite supposedly being the best shot in MI5) misses, so Silva shoots her dead.

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LesterGroans
Jun 9, 2009

It's funny...

You were so scary at night.


Yeah, that one. I remember people being upset about it.

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I suspect it's the one where Silva challenges Bond to shoot something off the Bond girl's head like William Tell and Bond (despite supposedly being the best shot in MI5) misses, so Silva shoots her dead.

I thought he missed on purpose?

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asecondduck
Feb 18, 2011

Wait. What the heck happened to the first duck?


That scene is hard to figure out--James misses the shot, but we're not sure what would have happened even if he free sex video film had hit the shot glass. Silva might have shot her anyway. And that's a hard shot to make, James may have missed and hit her instead.

In any occasion the whole scene is dumb because literally the only thing that makes sense for the character (not just Bond, even, literally any action protagonist) would have been to use the gun to escape. Shoot it at Silva/one of the goons/an explosive the screenwriter conveniently placed at the scene/LITERALLY ANYTHING BUT THE GODDAMN LOVE INTEREST.

There's literally no reason for her to have died besides lovely writing. Her death ends up meaning diddly loving squat to the character or the plot. She's lead him to Silva, James has already hosed her, so uh, might as well just kill her off then. Ugh.

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CelticPredator
Oct 11, 2013



Also that one liner is lovely and mean, even for Bond. He usually isn’t that nasty towards his love interests deaths.

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Mantis42
Jul 26, 2010


Man I love Bond movies. Well, okay, I actively hate 17 years old naked Die Another Day, but every other movie I love. Even the Roger Moore ones casual audiences seem to dislike (seriously, Goons put anal sex accidents video Moonraker and hentai schoolgirl extreme lesbian A View to a Kill at the lesbian ass lick video bottom?!) are endlessly watchable.

Craig is the best Bond, and, while tastes differ, its hard to argue that his run hasn't been the most exceptional since Connery. sexy fat girls sex Casino Royale is the best movie in the franchise, one of the few movies to give Bond a real arc, and the closest adaptation of one of the Fleming novels.

free sex movies girl Quantum of Solace had a rough behind the scenes development, but is pretty, has two of the best sequences in the series (the opening car chase and the opera scene are both phenomenal), and is already seeing a critical reevaluation the way OHMSS did. People mock its villain's plot, but a rich capitalist engineering a third world coup, with the tacit support of the CIA, in order to control their natural resources is something that real life Bond villains do, and is perfect for the grounded take they were going for when Craig first started. And Mr. Greene is a compelling villain, who gets one of the cruelest comeuppances in the series.

free porn vidoes sites Skyfall is Craig's vanilla ice madonna sex Goldfinger, a less cerebral, more schlocky take on the format that really resonated with audiences for whatever reason. Except Bond doesn't spend a third of the movie imprisoned, so actually nude men in suits Skyfall is better. Sure, the plot takes a few shortcuts, but its never as nonsensical as, like, 90% of the franchise. Silva is a fun villain to watch, Deakins shot the hell out of it, and watching Bond turn his childhood home into a death trap makes for a memorable and riveting climax. Who dislikes this movie??

Everyone hates on fairley odd parents porn Spectre, but its actually 2/3rds of a great film. That is to say, everything up to the moment Bond escapes from the torture device. The brothers twist and the retconning was weird, but what really hurts the movie was the wet fart of a third act that wastes all the great tension the beginning of the movie builds. You've got Mr. White's return (and the great callback to it when Bond is at his lowest at Blofield's base), the train fight, the Mexican city cold open, Q's workshop, etc etc, its all good stuff. How do you fix the movie? You take out them being brothers and you don't let Bond escape the base so effortlessly. They should have used the original ending, with the rest of the MI6 crew charging into the base as a callback to all the old "good guy army vs bad guy army" endings of the older films. That's essentially what the movie was, a sly remake of one of the Connery films, like YOLT. Oh well.

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

Fancy.


The bad guy from teen birthday party theme Quantum of Solace was incredibly distracting because he looked almost identical to Jools Holland.

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esperterra
Mar 24, 2010

There are no such things as miracles.




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Man I love Bond movies. Well, okay, I actively hate best sex webcam sites Die Another Day, but every other movie I love. Even the Roger Moore ones casual audiences seem to dislike (seriously, Goons put ashley simpson sex tapes Moonraker and lesbian vampire killers film A View to a Kill at the hardcore rape porn video bottom?!) are endlessly watchable.

Craig is the best Bond, and, while tastes differ, its hard to argue that his run hasn't been the most exceptional since Connery. free fat nude women Casino Royale is the best movie in the franchise, one of the few movies to give Bond a real arc, and the closest adaptation of one of the Fleming novels.

the firm sex scene Quantum of Solace had a rough behind the scenes development, but is pretty, has two of the best sequences in the series (the opening car chase and the opera scene are both phenomenal), and is already seeing a critical reevaluation the way OHMSS did. People mock its villain's plot, but a rich capitalist engineering a third world coup, with the tacit support of the CIA, in order to control their natural resources is something that real life Bond villains do, and is perfect for the grounded take they were going for when Craig first started. And Mr. Greene is a compelling villain, who gets one of the cruelest comeuppances in the series.

journal of sex roles Skyfall is Craig's young teenage girl naked Goldfinger, a less cerebral, more schlocky take on the format that really resonated with audiences for whatever reason. Except Bond doesn't spend a third of the movie imprisoned, so actually hairy pussy getting fuck Skyfall is better. Sure, the plot takes a few shortcuts, but its never as nonsensical as, like, 90% of the franchise. Silva is a fun villain to watch, Deakins shot the hell out of it, and watching Bond turn his childhood home into a death trap makes for a memorable and riveting climax. Who dislikes this movie??

Everyone hates on games for sex girls Spectre, but its actually 2/3rds of a great film. That is to say, everything up to the moment Bond escapes from the torture device. The brothers twist and the retconning was weird, but what really hurts the movie was the wet fart of a third act that wastes all the great tension the beginning of the movie builds. You've got Mr. White's return (and the great callback to it when Bond is at his lowest at Blofield's base), the train fight, the Mexican city cold open, Q's workshop, etc etc, its all good stuff. How do you fix the movie? You take out them being brothers and you don't let Bond escape the base so effortlessly. They should have used the original ending, with the rest of the MI6 crew charging into the base as a callback to all the old "good guy army vs bad guy army" endings of the older films. That's essentially what the movie was, a sly remake of one of the Connery films, like YOLT. Oh well.

I agree with most of this post, but GoldenEye is still the best

e: oh and i still haven't seen spectre tbqh

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Violator
May 15, 2003



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I thought he missed on purpose?

I can’t remember the exact timing, but did Bond still have the radioactive shrapnel in his chest at that point? I thought one of the plot points was that he was feeling weak, his aim was off off, failed his fitness test, etc. But then he cut the shrapnel out and had it tested and found out it was affecting him and then he started returning back to normal once it was out.

I remember some complaints about Spectre about him being able to shoot the helicopter when he was such a bad shot in Skyfall, but I have to be all, “Well actually he had been poisoned...”

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Payndz
Sep 22, 2006

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So I twatted them with a magic yo-yo. Because, hell, why not?


Bond escaping the base in Spectre was basically 'aimbot LOL'. It has to be the most tension-free action sequence in the entire series, because Bond is acting as if he's invulnerable and knows it. "I'll just stroll about in the open and headshot multiple guys shooting at me from 100 yards away, tum-ti-tum." Even loving Commando at least had Arnold acting as if he was in free massive dildo porn some peril.

Of course, there is the Total Recall theory that Bond was lobotomised by Blofeld, and everything that happens in the third act is his mind's last desperate attempt to save itself by coming up with a ridiculously OTT scenario where he wins over insane odds one last time...

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Violator
May 15, 2003



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Bond escaping the base in Spectre was basically 'aimbot LOL'. It has to be the most tension-free action sequence in the entire series, because Bond is acting as if he's invulnerable and knows it. "I'll just stroll about in the open and headshot multiple guys shooting at me from 100 yards away, tum-ti-tum." Even loving Commando at least had Arnold acting as if he was in miriam gonzalez nude pics some peril.

Of course, there is the Total Recall theory that Bond was lobotomised by Blofeld, and everything that happens in the third act is his mind's last desperate attempt to save itself by coming up with a ridiculously OTT scenario where he wins over insane odds one last time...

The escape didn’t bother me make sex last longer too much, but I’ll never forget how during the torture scene the audience I saw the movie with started giggling loudly when the lady said she loved him. I can roll with a lot, but their relationship was just too thin at that point for me and that’s the thing the most distracted me during the finale.

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(seriously, Goons put hairy mature pussy porn Moonraker and keira knightley atonement sex A View to a Kill at the find free porn movie bottom?!)

That's ... not a goon thing. The only thing Moonraker has going for it is Ken Adam's production design (it's basically the best and only preview of what he would have done on Star Trek: Planet of the Titans), and A View to a Kill is an absolute mess outside of Walken and the theme song. Moore didn't even want to porno de mujeres infieles do it, feeling that he was too old for the role, but he was under contract and they wouldn't let him out. He was also absolutely horrified when he learned that not only was Tanya Roberts almost 30 years younger than him, he was actually older than her free view movie porn mother, and he begged the producers to re-cast the role to be more age-appropriate. He didn't win that battle, either.

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Sep 22, 2006

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That's ... not a goon thing. The only thing Moonraker has going for it is Ken Adam's production design
It's also got Corinne's death, which is surprisingly arty, and savage, for a Moore film. And the centrifuge scene, where Bond actually seems to be suffering after his near-murder, is pretty well done.

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SleepCousinDeath
Oct 13, 2012


Moonraker has one of the more memorable James Bond characters

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Wheat Loaf
Feb 13, 2012

Fancy.


free porn hd quality Moonraker also has the scene where Bond drives his Bondola through a square in Venice (?) and it makes a pigeon do a double-take.

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